Quick summary: This gentle guide walks you through what to do in the first hours and days after a loved one passes.
- The first steps depend on where the passing occurs: call the hospice provider, call 911 if there is no hospice, or let facility staff guide you.
- After the passing is pronounced, there is no need to rush; you may take time with your loved one before making calls.
- When ready, contact a funeral home to arrange transportation into their care, at any hour.
- In the following days, notify close family, decide on burial or cremation if not planned, and meet the funeral home to plan.
Losing someone you love is one of life’s most difficult experiences, and in the midst of grief you are often asked to make decisions and handle practical matters. It can feel overwhelming. This gentle guide walks you through what to do in the first hours and days, so you can move forward one step at a time. Please know that you do not have to navigate any of it alone.
In the first hours
The very first steps depend on where your loved one passed away.
- At home under hospice care: Call the hospice provider. A nurse will come to confirm the passing and guide you; you do not need to call 911.
- At home without hospice: Call 911. Emergency responders will handle the required legal steps.
- In a hospital or care facility: The staff will notify you and begin the necessary procedures, and can help you contact a funeral home.
Once the passing has been formally pronounced, there is no need to rush. Take a moment. You are allowed to sit with your loved one, gather close family, and breathe before making the next call.
Contacting a funeral home
When you are ready, contact a funeral home to arrange transportation of your loved one into their care. This can happen at any hour. A caring provider will coordinate the details with sensitivity and begin guiding you through the arrangements. Families across Placer County often reach out to us at SF Mortuary during this time, and we take that trust seriously.
Notifying family and close friends
Reach out to immediate family and closest friends first. It is completely acceptable to ask a trusted relative or friend to help share the news, so the responsibility does not fall on you alone. A short, honest message is all that is needed. There will be time later for a fuller announcement or obituary.
In the first few days
Over the coming days, several practical matters will need attention. There is no need to do them all at once:
- Decide on burial or cremation, if this was not already planned. If you would like help thinking it through, our guide to cremation and burial options can help.
- Meet with the funeral home to plan the service. They will help you consider a graveside service, a graveside service, or a memorial gathering.
- Locate important documents, such as any pre-planning arrangements, life insurance policies, or the will.
- Secure your loved one’s home, pets, and property.
- Begin gathering information for the death certificate and obituary.
Practical matters that can wait
Notifying banks, employers, Social Security, and insurance companies is important, but most of it can wait until after the service. Order several certified copies of the death certificate — you will need them for many of these tasks. Give yourself permission to attend to these things gradually.
Caring for yourself and your family
Grief is not a checklist. Alongside the practical steps, allow space for emotion, lean on those around you, and accept offers of help — a meal, a ride, a listening ear. If children are grieving, speak to them honestly and simply. Consider reaching out to a grief support group or counselor when you feel ready.
Frequently asked questions
Do I have to decide everything right away? No. Beyond bringing your loved one into a funeral home’s care, most decisions can be made over the following days. A good funeral home will never pressure you.
How many death certificates should I order? Many families order 8 to 12 certified copies, as banks, insurers, and government agencies each typically require an original.
What if there were no pre-arrangements? That is very common. The funeral home will walk you through every choice with care and clear explanations.
If you have recently lost someone, or expect to soon, the caring team at SF Mortuary in Auburn is here to help at any hour. Call us at 530-889-0767 and we will guide you gently through each step. Learn more about our funeral services in Auburn.
